You wana to fight me? Then fight these tears!!!

What is there to say?....im starting to do bad in school....afta last game I dunno what came over me I was so disappointed in myself I don't think I have ever played so bad in my life I played terrible..no that does not even justify how bad I played...the walk home helped me get my head straight I guess went to the hospital again las night, still no change.....went to pay a visit to some lost friend to day....n my sis...daffodils...they where her favorite flowers, n I guess mine as well...After laying them upon her grave I stood in mute silence for God knows how long....my kness buckled as I finally tried to walk away....when I turned my back I could feel them watching me.......

It aint EaZZZZy being ChEeSe!!!!

Tunnu, tunnu, tunnu
I am really missin you
Do u remember the time at west ed?
You where all jolly n laughin,
You took of that my hat,
The one we both like,
You should have seen the look on your face it was classic,
Eyes poppin wide kinda like the startling look you have n say
"OMG IT'S AL-QEIDA!"

n then theres Jocey....
yo wtf he shaved yo head head n u didnt tell me
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Lailas reaction...
WTF u shaved your head whyyyyyyyy?????
OMG...that looks fuckin hot!

Then there was Hugh's reaction...
'WHOA!' takin a step back n pointing
'WHOA!! WHERE DID YOUR HAIR GO??!?!?...
what happned???!?!?!....
OMG YOU SHAVED YOUR HEAD!...
WHOAAA!!!"

An lastly Dantes classic reaction....
"Yo! man u shaved your head" (half n hour later after we have been playin bball at the Y)

Conquering...

Ive been to the mother fuckin mountain top,
Heard mother fuckers talk,
N seen them drop,
If I aint got a weapon,
Im gonna pick up a rock,
Then im gonna bust your ass,
N countine to rock.....

Random

sop we have won our first game it was pretty funny coming to think about it...the opposing theam has the ball n is coming to our side n all you hear is "BOX OUT!" "BOX OUT!!!!!!"....n Brother Murtada once the other team gets the ball even though they r still on there side "HELP D!....HELP D!!!!!!!!!!"..lol......I love you guys dont eat me!!!!

And ya thas about the only happy moment I have had....just been stressin all the funerals n hospital visits....it really takes its toll on you......i cannot even go on with writing this it hurts to much so im going to just leave off here.......

Random

im think im going crazy...in n ocean of ignorance, bloody tired n sore....i think i pushed myself way 2 mcuh a bball practice......I'm tyin to find my way back to sanity again though I don't really know what I'm gonna do when I get there.....

Stressin like there aint no 2morrow...

As you mite have noticed ive been really stressin for the last few weeks...juz alot going on wit...well everything...i was supposed to go to seatlle for Artemis wedding (close freind of mine, a very nice guy) but i got caught up with things over here.....my best freind mahmoud, his car got shot up luckily he nor his wife where in it at the time....theres been increasing shooting theres so i told them to leave asap n had everything arranged...i got bills to pay n money to make....i intend to move out asap juz looking for a suitable location....but what trouble me most of all is hw much i miss ma sis, Aisha it has been 10 years n my grief remain for she was eveything to me n still is...memories flash back everytime i step out of my house....that was whereshe pushed me on the swing....thas where we built a castle...she taught me how to blade over there...we would always read under those trees...she bought me candy from here...all these memoeris....i used to play hockey ova there....that was my best freinds house.....so many memories...so many......

Aisha

Although it has been along time,
You have all been mine sis,
Remember the laughs, the tears,
All the fun times we had,
Remember mud pie?
The day we wathed the birds fly so high?
Wishin we could as well,
You taught me how to blade,
Imma shade betta than you!
We went to the movies,
Walked in the parks,
You explained to me how Im supposed to act,
In front of ppl n gurlz,
You taught me to neva betray, backstab, nor gossip
You taught me to be stong n neva show my pain
To read the meaning n the truth behind ppls words n faces
Ive done what I can
Ive done all I can...but yet it seems that I have failed.....
Theres no way I can pay you back,
But my plan is to show you that I understand,
You are appreciated sis

Nelo Angelo- Black Angel

Rumor says blue blood
my be flowing in that guy's
body. I tell ya, if he glares
at a guy, even the Devil
may cry.....

I dont want to see them fuckerz tryin to rob my papers,
Shut the fuck up before I send you to meet the maker,
Send you back wit ur soul on fire,
Let them see what you could have inspired,
Chillin wit the demons instead of aching for your souls desire,
Take it back n move it slowly,
Im attacking all these homies,
You'll run away hear my name,
Even though you dont even know me,
You bullshit in your rhymes,
You claim ur gangsta,
But nigga u nottin but a prankster.


.....just expressin my mood

Surah Fussilat, 33

Who could say anything better than the one who
summons to Allah, and acts rightly, and says,
"I am of those who submit themslves to Allah"?

Al-Fatihah (The Opening)

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Praise be to Allah,
The Cherisher and Sustainer of the worlds.

Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Master of the Day of judgment

Thee do we worship, and thine aid do we seek

Show us the straight way

The way of those whom, thou hast bestowed Thy Grace,
Those whose Portion
Is not wrath
Nor of those whom go astray

Friday's Randomness

man im bloody tired!...played bball wit youcef las nite, kind adangerous wit all the ice but man the weather was so nice we could not pass the chance to shoot some hoopz......n flip i found out that I still have my injury i have not done any sports for 3 weeks hoping if i rested my injury would heal but it has not and now i have a game today....i could not even stay for the halaaqa las nite becuz my injury was botherin me so much:S.....arrraaaagggggggggggggggggh the flippin flippiddy flip flip (k ignore me im stressin!)....oh n on the bright side laila bought me coach carter so ya that made my day....oh n mahryam (still dont kno how to spell her name..IM SORRY BINTI, DON'T EAT ME!) bout me a suede jacket i lub it!...thank you!!!! :D

Poem

Goblets of blood are overflowing from my eyes. Who can know the plaint of my striken heart?

The dust clouds of despair has obliterated every path. How can one discern the sign of the end of ones journey?

Those scars of destruction were not expunged even by spring; so throughly had the garden been ravaged!

In search of the non-exsistent goal of madness who knows wiether mad ones have set out?

Just to kiss but once the brow of the candle.....the moths are darting towars annihilation.


Just poem I found in my journal from long ago...I dont even have a title for it....